She'll Grow Back: Elven Songs-A-Singing

Thursday, December 18, 2008

Elven Songs-A-Singing

Wow. I didn't realize I had this many songs about elves on my hard drive. I'd figured this'd be five or six songs, maximum, but here it is -- 48 minutes of elvish material.

The first five songs are about how elves help out Santa: two of them slip down the chimneys themselves to unlock the front door. In these songs, you'll hear a Thurl soundalike (track one), the story of how one elf is so tiny he takes naps in Santa's beard (only a leetle weird), and even how fat old Santa ended up bareass one Christmas night. Tennessee Ernie's brownie has a Big-Brother eye in the sky, just like in the Mexican holiday anti-classic film Santa Claus (released the year before this song, for the record).

Track six is an instrumental palate cleanser, and then we're into three songs about the elves' labor complaints. Some elves unionize, some get laid off, and some just bitch and keep on working.

Then we have a collection of miscellaneous dark/adult elf songs, concluding with another Waitsian ditty, as Georgia's own Drive-By Truckers sing the story of "Mrs. Claus' Kimono." Finally, our hidden mystery track (set 30 years ago today) takes up again the cause of unionization and very presciently deals with global warming at the same time.

This collection is surely not complete, so if you have any other songs about elves, please let me know in the comments. I'd love to put together a part two!


01. The Three Little Dwarfs - Hardrock, Coco, and Joe
02. Tennessee Ernie Ford - Jingle-O The Brownie
03. Keith Lester - Silver Spurs: A Christmas Song
04. Dan Marshall and Tommy's Chorus - Randi The Handi Elf
05. Sonny Bloch's Coralairs - Louie The Elf
06. Bill Brovold - The Ugly Elf
07. Ryan Allen - Elves On Strike
08. Barenaked Ladies - Elf's Lament
09. The Canadian Dollars - Outsourcin' Christmas
10. Neil Gaiman - Nicholas Was...
11. The Reverend Glen Armstrong - Death Of An Elf
12. The Drive-By Truckers - Mrs. Claus' Kimono


CD said...

i have a feeling i have more somewhere in my library, but the only "elf" track i can find right now is:

"Come On! Let's Boogie to the Elf Dance!" by Sufjan Stevens

CD said...

i'm not going to be the guy that ruins the mystery track, but allow me to say, good on you, mate.

Mark H. Besotted said...

Good call on the Sufjan -- I forgot to look through all the other minor folders I have Christmas music tucked away in while I was compiling.

I guess I'll have to put together a volume two for sure then. Dunno what I'll do for a hidden track on that one, though...

Nick said...

Probably way too late but Bob River'#s excellent parody of the Beatles, 'All You Need Is Elves'